Social?

  Some people are born with the confidence to talk to anyone others find it just a little more difficult. I used to be one of the latter.
  Since the rise of social media sites such as Facebook and Twitter people are able to document their lives online daily; allowing friends and others to see what's going on in their lives. Has this way of social contact limited our ability to socialise in person? We are able to hide behind a screen making our world seem busy and fun, but is this always really the case?
  Years ago Myspace used to be the 'big thing'. I, at 15, used to be obsessed with it; constantly uploading photos, statuses and events. I was able to be who I wanted to be. I could show people who I wanted to be and maybe not always be 100% honest about it. It was a form of escape from the mundane routine of school, at that time. I would go out, even just to town, and take photos of the day just to prove I was busy and social. In actual fact, I was very shy. I hadn't found the confidence to blossom. I met lots of different people and there were some who were very chatty and I was able to fall comfortably in to conversation with them; there were others, I found, that were the same as me. Online we I used to chat with friends of friends and they were bubbly, confident and interesting when on face to face contact they were quiet and shy. To find such a contrast it's incredible. Hiding behind the screen gave us the confidence to be who we secretly wanted to be.


  Nowadays, I think social networking, for me, has changed. I no longer need to pretend to be someone I'm not, I don't pretend to do lots of different things. I actually do them. I document times in my life that are important to me, I'm not so fussed about putting new photos up every week. I don't hide behind a screen giving out a false impression, I am the same in person.
  I met the love of my life years ago and after a long wait we are finally together now. We live together and spend as much time as we can afford together. Last year, I had the best summer ever, going to different local events, drinking until stupid o'clock and being silly. It was the most fun I've had in years. He is such a social butterfly (yes, he's very girly) and has the ability to talk to anyone. I had gained my social confidence at college by doing drama/performing arts and having to start with a whole new group of people. This was a momentous turning point for me and it has changed me for the better. Not only did college help it was also being with a man who has such a natural skill of talking. He has given me speaking confidence that I never thought I'd have. He has and continues to, introduce me to lots of different people, of all ages and backgrounds and I am now able to hold my own in a conversation. There are some I like and some I don't but either way I am able to deal with and converse with each according to the situation. For this, I'm eternally grateful.


  Using social media to promote yourself and give an impression is still relevant today especially when you look at musicians who use it to create a solid fan base. It's a great platform to start a career but with everyone doing it there's no way of knowing who to follow, without going through each and every person. There are those who use social media in a negative way; getting kicks out of bullying others. Looking at the instance of Cher Lloyd, who is like Marmite; you either love her or hate her. I, personally, think she's a good inspiration for young girls. Cher has been harassed online for a long time now and is publicly speaking about it, which is great. She isn't the only one to suffer from it but I think it must bring great comfort to people to know that they aren't alone. Anyone who bullies is just showing their own insecurities but by doing it and hiding behind a screen just goes to show how even more pathetic they actually are. There have been reports of those who write disgusting comments on memorial profiles. This, I will never understand and to anyone who does it; You are worthless.


  Maybe sometimes we need to hide behind things because we are scared of being honest with who we really are. Yet, maybe now, we can put down the 'screen' and be true to ourselves. By pretending to be someone else not only are you hiding from others, you're hiding from yourself. 


  

Blinded by self doubt

  I'm sure I'm not the only one who has days like this. The sudden feeling that you haven't and/or won't achieve anything in life. It doesn't even have to last for a day, it could just be a few minutes of self doubt and you end up thinking you're the worst person in the world. This isn't true though, you aren't. In fact by having this brief spell of self doubt it goes to show that you have something you want to do, you're just being a worrier. 
  There are plenty of people in this world who are natural born worriers, then there are those who are so laid back they go full circle. I like to think I'm a mix of the two; I hope, nearer the laid back side of things, but others will probably tell you different. I know people at both ends of the scale but I couldn't imagine being like that. Not caring about anything or worrying so much about every little detail that it consumes you? No thanks, you can keep that to yourself.


  Self doubt is something we all encounter through our life journey. Without it we can't be inspired or encouraged to go on. The doubt helps, it gives you the opportunity to say, 'I will do this and I will prove it to myself, and everyone.' Doubting our abilities is a natural thing to do. I doubt, sometimes,  that I will ever be in a job that I've always wanted to do; due to not going to University. No matter what happens, going to University will always be a last resort, I don't believe a piece of paper should make you more qualified for a job if you have talent and passion. 


  Once you've found something you've always wanted or that makes your heart flutter even more then go for it! Ignore the little voice that's telling you that you're no good at anything. So, there may be loads of people all going for the job, you might think other people write better than you or you might not have the same start in life as everyone? Who, actually cares? If you think you've got a chance then give it a damn good go! 'You only get one chance in life to make a difference.'